Here it's almost 4 in the morning and I haven't been able to get to sleep ... still feel my heart pumping, my breath short and fast, anxiety ... almost ... overwhelming.
Oh Lord
Breathe pain in
Breathe pain out
In
Out
Oh Lord
I finally went to my bookshelves and pulled out a couple of CS Lewis books. The Problem of Pain (sic!) and Mere Christianity. I can't find the dogeared versions of either ... what did I do with them ... ? But I found another copy of each. The latter is in hardback ... a generous and loving gift of you my dear dear Momma ... oh oh oh Momma how I miss you ...
OK
So Pain ... is part of Life
It's the Way of the Cross
It's the Way of Life
It's the Way
It's Your Way
Oh but Lord the Pain ...
Oh God
It Hurts
But of course it Hurts ... it's Pain .. that's what the word means ... it Hurts ...
Oh Lord I need you so so so so much
Oh Momma how I miss you ... I love you & miss you ...
I love you
I love you
I hurt
but I love you
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