Hollywood's Post-Traditional Families

Lately I've seen several movies that depicted what I gather is the Hollywood version of post-modern families.

2 Days in Paris, which just opened today, here, and which I just saw today, is set in Paris and gives us a glimpse of the heroine's nuclear family, and multiple depictions of the urban social network that Hollywood finds so attractive as sort of substitute families. The archetypal depiction of this kind of "friends as family in the city" is really the TV series Friends. And I like Friends; so did Mom ... who in such things was definitely a "modern." 2 Days in Paris Mom would not have seen, but I think she wouldn't have liked it if she did, due to its pervasive occupation with sexual humor that really wasn't very funny, just kind of sad: as if the film really found that kind of humor to be a plain substitute for genuine communication and genuine connection. And on this I would have been in complete agreement with Mom.

Across the Universe opened here last week or the week before. I saw it last weekend. Much of this musical pastiche was really appealing to the part of me nostalgic for the days of the Beatles. And the music was excellent. Still, set in New York, and regarding family, it was a definite endorsement of the "friends as family in the city" over the nuclear family; and ended by in effect endorsing the romance dyad over the Friends as Family in the City.

The Brave One was excellent. I've already mentioned liking very much its treatment of Grief. It's set in New York City and depicts urban nuclear family / Friends as Family in the City social arrangements.

New York City seems in so many movies to be a setting for this kind of thing. From Woody Allen's Manhattan in 1979 to the musical Rent in 2005, and beyond (see above) all give this view of the post-traditional urban family and ur-family.

Other recent movies treat the nuclear family as the norm: Evan Almighty, Transformers, Knocked Up, Michael Clayton, and even, surprisingly, and anachronistically, Elizabeth: The Golden Age.

There are exceptions, as in the excellent Eastern Promises and We Own the Night. And of course the wonderful and critically under-rated movies of Tyler Perry.

I know I've definitely been especially sensitive to the various family depictions Hollywood advances because of my own family tragedy that I've already talked about quite a bit in this blog. And I'll swear, since Mom's death, all depictions of nuclear families and friends-as-families have become viscerally repugnant to me. Today, watching 2 Days in Paris, I kept thinking of Sartre's "l'enfer, c'est les autres": hell is other people. There were some witty parts, but on the whole, could anyone actually want to live the life of any of the people we meet in this movie? I guess so. It was clear that the scriptwriter and director mean these people, and their lives, to be appealing. Whew ... just the opposite from my angle. For me this movie could be a great antidote to loneliness; at least I couldn't help reflecting, while thinking of Sartre, that there are definitely worse things than being alone.

You know, I think I'll try to see Eastern Promises again. Great story ... and really a very fine exploration of different kinds of family and different kinds of relationship. Among other things we get a convincing depiction of the dangers of radical disconnection from one's family; and a beautiful depiction of extended family under stress. The final scene is so moving.

Just my 2 bits of course. Thank you O Lord for movies that help me to process through and understand better what is happening to me in terms of family, as unwelcome as what's happened to me is.

Charles Delacroix
F of Ss Isaac Joques et col
F of St Paul of the Cross