Salvifici Doloris and Job ... and Mom

I was reading Salvifici Doloris some more. And what a wonderful thing it is. In a way the first part, at least, treats Suffering in the Old Testament as exemplified above all by Job; and Suffering in the New Testament as examplified above all by Christ.

Salvifici Doloris declares that the Old Covenant unabashedly identifies Suffering with Evil. Job appears to connect this Suffering with the New Covenant conception of Suffering as Redemptive: see Job 19:25: “For I know that my Redeemer lives, and at last he will stand upon the earth.” At last … but not yet, in the time of the Old Covenant; and not yet, in the time of Holy Saturday under the new Covenant.

In the meantime, the Suffering that is Evil, the Suffering that consumes Job, is the Suffering he knows to be an abomination, evil, unfathomable, utterly unacceptable … and so he gives voice to his protest against this evil …

In any event, Job I read at Mom's Grave tonite and really every word just plain goes to the heart of everything as far as I can see ...

“My days are swifter than a runner; they flee away, they see no good”
Job 9:25. So it seems to me too in the Here and Now. “Good” … like beauty … is in the grave … “Peace is in the grave, the grave holds all things beautiful and good” says Shelley, and so it feels … and if this is Holy Saturday, if the Here and Now is really equivalent to Holy Saturday, as von Balthasar says, then isn’t this utter truth: the grave holds All Things Beautiful and Good.” Yet oh how bleak is Holy Saturday in the Tomb …

“I loathe my life” Job 7:16, 10:1. This sounds very right, very on target. I don’t … or at least, don’t ordinarily … I don’t any longer hate myself. But I think “I loathe my life” would exactly describe how I feel about my own life at present. Loathesome and filled with bitterness and hopelessness.

“I will not restrain my mouth; I will speak in the anguish of my spirit; I will complain in the bitterness of my soul.” (Job 7:11) and “I will give free utterance to my complaint; I will speak in the bitterness of my soul." Job 10:1. And for this I am so deeply grateful. Job is not silent; he will not be silent; he will demand to know Why (see 19:22) the Evil that is Suffering is inflicted upon him.

Job wishes he were simply left alone, rather than have Three Comforters to “help” him. He also wonders, again and again, why God can’t simply leave him alone long enough to swallow his own spittle and catch his breath: “Let me alone, for my days are a breath” Job 7:16.

And what of Theological Hope? Oh Lord, I embrace Your Faith, Hope, and Love as a matter of Intent; as a matter of the Will: not of my Will but of Yours. Yet in this world I see nothing left … nothing at all, for me, not here. “Behold, he will slay me; I have no hope” Job 13:15. Perhaps this is where Job connects with Christ … the Christ of Job 19:25 … the Christ Who Is Job’s sole Hope; the Christ Who Is my sole Hope.

With the death of my mother, Love in this world is gone: only Love of Christ remains.

With the death of my mother, Faith in this world is gone: only Faith of Christ remains.

With the death of my mother, Hope in this world is utterly gone: only Hope of Christ remains.

Oh Lord, with Father Job, I seek Your Face, Your Faith, Your Hope, Your Love.

I mourn you Mom … oh oh oh how I miss you …

I beg you Lord by Your Faith, Hope, and Love, grant her blessings in Your World to Come.

Oh Father Job, by your prayers, help me seek the Redeemer Who You Knew to be your sole Faith, Hope and Love.

I love you Momma.

I love you Christ Jesus.

Amen.

Charles Delacroix
Feast of St Bruno